Tuesday, December 8, 2009

Let Me Be Your Angel

Hearing you sing about an angel
Saw her on the street and she took your breath away
But baby she's just a pretty face
When you see me ya might as well be looking the other way
You'd let her break your heart just to make her smile
You don't even know you're breaking mine every day
But boy I'll still love you and you'll always take my breath away
So let me be your angel
Let me take your breath away; put a smile on your face
So run your fingers through my hair
I'm gonna show you how much I care
Baby let me be your angel
Talking about her breaking hearts along the way
She's the kinda girl doing that every day
But all the time I wish it's me you're looking for
You know I'll still love you and you'll always take my breath away
So let me be your angel
Tonight as you're seeing your angel's face
I'm seeing yours and hoping mine will take her place
So that maybe someday I'll open my eyes to see your face
Because boy I've never felt such grace
That's inside your gaze
So maybe I can be your angel
I could take your breath away; put a smile on your face
Maybe you'll run your fingers through my hair
Let me show you how much I care
Baby maybe you'll let me be your angel

Tuesday, December 1, 2009

Welcome to Change

Over the past year, I've gone through big changes; both physical, personally, and spiritually. I've found that while I am strong, I have weaknesses. That while I am vulnerable, I can withstand anything. While I'm an optimist, it doesn't mean that I cannot shed tears of sorrow. And while I have lost things, I have gained so very much more.

In January, I went through a serious break-up. And though for months afterwards, it hurt, seemed like I wouldn't find somebody new, or have any sort of relationship with my mother again... I have found healing in laughter and faith; strength in the fact that I am young and he won't be the last to hurt my heart; and the power of a mother's love and compassion is great beyond anything in this world. Over the months since then, my mom and I have become closer than ever before.

I've found the silver lining to my clouds through my faith and a backbone through the foundation of my family. I lost a few friends, but gained knowledge through experience. So thank you, God, for all that you have helped me achieve this year and I pray that you continue to bless me with the wonderful people and things that help me to overcome the obstacles that life places before me.

Sunday, November 22, 2009

What's Next?

So I'd like to let you know that I am now employed. I'm still looking for my very own Mr. Right. I want to move... To see things. I want to feel new things. Find new things about myself and test my own limits.

Things in people's lives help us to see all the things we want... Realize dreams we didn't know that we had. Sometimes we have to test boundaries to lyrics. Go out on a limb and have a good time with someone you're seeing in a new light. Sometimes we want things to work out... They don't. But it's all for the better. I'll just keep my fingers crossed that God helps out.. Cuz He's the one that knows what He's doing.. Not me.

Saturday, November 14, 2009

Live Life to the Lyrics of a Good Tune

The Song Takes Me There
1st Draft

Ridin' home today with the stereo on
Changin channels til I heard that song
Ya know the one; Makes me think of you
And the last time; The one before we said goodbye
And yeah it takes me back
Haven't felt like that in a while
So I sit and smile as the song takes me there
To the night when we were just holdin' hands
Walkin' down on the beach with nothin but the sand
And the sound of the waves
The nights we spent in the bed of your truck
Starin' at the stars then makin' love
Yeah the song takes me there
Layin' down tonight pictures fill my head
Of the night you left, all the things that ya said
The radio's on; That song comes along
Fallin' asleep I'm dreamin' of your arms
And I'll go back cuz the song takes me there
That field of flowers and kisses in the sun
Cane poles by the river and an old tire swing
Little boat on the middle of the lake
Layin' around all damn day
Listenin' to that song and oh it takes me
Yeah it takes me
Yeah that song takes me there

Thursday, November 12, 2009

From Where You Are

So far away from where you are
These miles have torn us worlds apart
And I miss you
Yeah, I miss you
So far away from where you are
Standing underneath the stars
And I wish you were here

I miss the years that were erased
I miss the way the sunshine would light up your face
I miss all the little things I never thought that they’d mean everything to me
Yeah, I miss you
And I wish you were here

I feel the beating of your heart
I see the shadows of your face
Just know that wherever you are
Yeah, I miss you
And I wish you were here

I miss the years that were erased
I miss the way the sunshine would light up your face
I miss all the little things
I never thought that they’d mean everything to me
Yeah, I miss you
And I wish you were here

So far away from where you are
These miles have torn us worlds apart
And I miss you
Yeah, I miss you
And I wish you were here

It's just past your birthday, baby girl... And I still can't believe it's gonna be four years you gone in Feb. Just keep watchin' us. Love you. RIP ACY 1990-2005

Monday, November 2, 2009

Maybe Pieces Make A Pretty Picture?

Lately, all these things have been running through my mind; leaving me in a tad of bind. They're the thoughts that just zoom and pass on through making it impossible to pin any one in particular down.

I'm torn between all the confusion of people from the past showing up and the feelings that come with them. I feel torn between the wisdom of my mother, and my heart that tells me maybe just one more chance... He only needs a friend. But when he talks, I know that all he's concerned with is himself.

So God... Please listen when I ask for your help; help in being strong enough to cut that chord. And hold me hand as I'm walking down this path, finding myself. Amen.

Thursday, October 29, 2009

Falling Apart to Fall Together

Have you ever been at that point where you wake up one day and you just realize that something's finally happening? It's been one of those days for me.

It's like that saying goes... "Sometimes things just have to fall apart so that they can fall together." Over the past year, I've had a serious relationship crumble around me, I kicked a habit, been through the motions of unemployment, and been out on my butt a handful of times. I think it's safe to say that I know what hitting rock bottom is.

With going through all these things that are happening in my life, I have found strength and love in faith and family. I know what it's like to attempt to go at it alone because of pride... I also know that it's a lonely road to do so. So I gave in when my family surrounded me and I know that my faith is not a crutch, but rather a means to keep sanity and to... keep going through it all.

I've gone from a silly girl that does nothing for herself, but hurt herself, to a girl who has grown to know herself better just by tripping and stumbling. I'm not a perfect person and I don't ever want to be. The thing that makes me me are my flaws and my ability and strength to accept them. I hope to only become stronger and smarter as my journey goes on.

Beginnings, Ends, and All In-between

Sometimes when you're little, you come up with all these crazy things that you wanna be when you grow up. Sometimes these dreams come true; others don't. Yet sometimes the ones that don't, they never stop. Those ones end up with new dreams and those ones can come true. The entire point of this is life doesn't always turn out the way we wanted it. No matter what though, it's always worth the ride.

I wanted to be a vet. And then a doctor. Then a nurse. At one point I even had myself convinced I might become a princess. No matter what I wanted to do, Mom and Dad pretty much always said I could do it.

Now I've grown and, even though I know MOST of these dreams were attainable, they were fads; the passion wasn't there for me. Over the past year, I gone through some dramatic changes, had my entire world shaken and turned, and found my outlet... And my passion. I've come back to writing and I dabble in most any art. That's where my heart is.

This blog will just take you through the journey as I find a way to give my passion to the world... And maybe someday, somewhere, somebody will know my name just for that.

Just remember this everybody, don't give up on dreams; just change them and put your mind, body, and soul in it.